Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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