Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
