you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
