I heard we made out
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
