5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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