Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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