I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
