i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Randomize