oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
PS: I just woke up from my shower
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
