I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
