Joe is yelling at the trees again.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize