I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
