you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Maybe he injected his testicle?
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Randomize
