I look better un-naked...
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
