Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize
