your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
do herpes really smell.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
