Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
This baby is an asshole
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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