Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
