So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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