I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
