i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
He kissed a someone with a penis
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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