on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
