Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize
