Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
