Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
