Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
