Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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