I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
