She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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