I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
