I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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