i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
