I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
