She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
