I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Panties = found
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