is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Actions speak louder than pants.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Randomize
