Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
