my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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