Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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