Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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