is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Barsexuality is the new black.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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