and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Randomize
