i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
