Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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