How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Randomize
