Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
