Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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