Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
