I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
