Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
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